fusion '09

good stuff, good stuff.

mary gave up her utmost, even for the least of Him.
that's what our passion for God is about.
to worship and give Him all praise.

during worship i saw like, a painting of Jesus hanging on the cross.
and that stuck in my mind for a while.
it was a beautiful piece of art.

and at another point in time, there was this really sweet tangible presence of God i felt, somewhere in the early part of "Rain Down".

but worship really is not about jumping, about raising hands.
yes, we rejoice in the Lord, it's even said in the bible to rejoice!

it's about exalting Him, honouring Him, and just praising Him with all that you got.
it's about surrendering, about accepting, about acknowledging, Him, not just in that 30 mins but in your entire life.

worship is a reflection of life.


recently, i've been more spiritually dry cos' been busy and tired, but i'm recovering now.
haha and wow, the feeling of being spiritually dry is kinda...sian? haha.


it feels good to get back on track and eat the bread again. (:


thank you for the cross, Lord.

what .

and never, ever say that to me again.

my fault? sure.

you try something, and you make a mess.
she asks me to clear it up, cos when she saw it you weren't there anymore.

so i find you at the tv, and after asking you to go clear it up, i got distracted by the tv, and you didn't go anyway.

so she shouts for both of us not switching off electrical appliances, etc, and to once again, clear up the whole freakin' mess.
i tell you to go clear it again, and tell you to help me switch off the stuff that we both left on, better than 2 people going to do a one-man job right?

did i make the mess? no.
did you make it seem like i was obligated to clear it up with you? yes.
was i obligated to clear it up with you? no.
was i not, watching tv, and you still bu shuang me like the mess was my fault? |
did i deserve to take off my time to help you do something, just cos you can't enjoy the tv as well, yet i was not supposed to do it, and you told me to do it, complete with the courtesy of shouting and lack of manners?

and my computer.
did i miss something?
do i owe you anything?
i don't recall so.
so don't you act like it's your right.

why.
why must you do this.
and she goes stereotype me with yall.
and i suffer the shockwaves from you.
which really hurts.


please. stop.

a new chapter...

hi 2009.

last year just zoomed by. probably the fastest year of my life.

and this year is going to be a year of mentorship.
i heard God say that.
it's going to be one where mentorship is a main theme.

looking forward to God in it. (:




i know i don't seem it.



but i do wish there was that common.

recent events

wow. the holidays are really zooming by.

some recent events.

jon choy's birthday (haha, k, maybe not so recent)

this was really funny.
as in not the party itself, but the nature of how i actually managed to be there.
see, cos i was actually supposed to be in a camp.
and i thought there was no hope, cos once in the camp i thought i was gonna miss choy's birthday for sure.

then i somehow just asked my teacher if i could be excused.
then he contemplated and said yes, but gave a curfew (so i was excused for a few hours).
i was delighted.
ten minutes later i was crying.
because due to the rain, my teacher changed his mind, and i got all my hopes up for nothing, and i was sad lah.
NO i didn't cry in front of everyone.
but i was just darn sad cos it's like, eh, my cell leader's 21st bday man.

and then after i wiped up my tears and joined the rest, my teacher came up behind me and said - "if you can get someone to fetch you, then i'll let you go. if not, forget it lah, huh?"
so i decided to call my mum just in case she was nearby.
she was at home, but offered to take me!!!
Praise God for mummy.

and 40 mins later, i'm at choy's hse, in singlet, cap and slippers :P
cool right.


nong!!

nong came back!!!
we had dinner and a stayover.
nong left back to usa.


family trip (wow i nearly forgot this)

we went to malaysia, port dickson!! :D
it was fun, my first attempt at fishing and neaarrlly caught a crab.
we went go-karting, archery, paintball, jalan-jalan, pool (ball), pool (swim), all sorts of fun stuff. not so much like tourists, but just for fun.

good time of family bonding. (:


sharity gift box (Founder's Men Assessment)

we had 3 consecutive, full, days, of doing quite tiring stuff.

first day i did warehousing and pick-up.
fortunately, last two days we went to man the box at orchard rd, outside taka.
thank martin for his ideas and ways. haha.
it was darn weird lah, people do weird stuff to pass time, which i wanted to go into details but then decided not to. sorry! ;)


THE REAL CAMP.

woohoo, this was really good. no pun.
God gave me revelation, and started doing different things in my life.
God is so good man.
and it also gave me a chance to see how our cluster is growing, and how TNG is growing.
when God told me "TNG is growing", i felt so good. (:

TNG, you're growing man.


official cell gathering

thaddeus, go away. stupid nutcracker.
haha, kidding lah, i don't bear any thing against you. (:

yep, we had an official cell bbq to end of the year.
marcus burnt my arm with a chicken wing. A CHICKEN WING!
thinking about it, i now find the humour stronger than the pain.
i don't think anyone's been burnt by a chicken wing before.
if you have, please tag, i would like to know. :D

and yeah, we had cell sharing and reflection.
the cell was getting everything ironed out, everyone was confessing their wrongs, and dislikes for other cell members in the past, or generally.
and everyone just gracefully accepted the feedback.

jon choy shared about how we had to be in the "pressure-cookers" (like said, at the rhema seminar) because our generation has to rise up fast and grow into leaders, cos' these are the end times. and how he's very encouraged to see our cell growing. (:

sara said she'll always be there, and that we can go to her for girl problems, HAHA. =P

our cell is good man, i love my cell. cool people.
random, whacky and cool.
we're gonna grow. (:


faa

formally known as "Founder's Award Assessment".
we were tested on adventure, first aid, drill, uniform, general knowledge.
scary. had to mug eh.
some-more had cell gathering the previous night.

but it wasn't as bad as i expected.
things went well.
didn't get sent home for uniform. =P

yep. feel liberated now! hahaha.



alright, that's an update.
i'm off to write cards for post-camp people.

...strange, if i recall, this post's tone and language wasn't really like my normal one.
maybe i use more singlish when i'm happier and i talk about shallow-er stuff. =P






i got wild, loose, inside my head.

to the cross.

recently, i had been feeling kinda bad, off and on, because i felt like a few of my friendships were straining...or the people involved were drifting apart.

and like... other family stuff.

but when i look to the cross,
and realise how Jesus was so rejected as well,
and people didn't appreciate Him for who He was,
although He was the Ultimate...

then i just feel comforted knowing that even if my friends don't fully appreciate me as much as i'd like them too, at least God appreciates me, and that's the best relationship. (:

and still, God works,
cos He showed me how my friend did appreciate me more than i thought. (:


so if any of you feel down because you feel under-appreciated, or feel like you're relationships are straining...
remember Jesus, and God's love, and lift all up to Him. (:

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also, i realised how to confirm.
once again, if Christ and God is the focus.
i learn how to differentiate.
and i learn how to know.

and now i know, that i truly don't.
thanks to cremon (:
for reminding me that if it IS, it has to be GOD-CALLED.
and one has to control his emotions, at all costs.

because emotions are of the flesh.
but you want IT to be of God.
and i know that this liking, wasn't called by God.
so i fee liberated.

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oh and service today was AWESOME.
you could feel God and the Holy Spirit just manifesting in the hall.
and i felt like God was watching pastor reuben just preach, and God was immensely proud.

worship was...convicting for me.
it made me realise i shouldn't be doing some things that i was doing.
not to distract my eyes with evil.
but to focus on the Spirit, on God, and on the cross.





to the cross we look.

speechless.

connecTiNG camp.
the P6 Orientation Camp for PLMC, organised by the sec 3s, bridging the gap between SilverBoxes (children's service) and The Next Generation (youth service).
it's really been the highlight of these holidays so far.

well, camp comm. had to write reflections to be published in HeartBeat, so i submitted this, which pretty much sums up the camp...on a more formal tone.

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Thinking about the P6 Orientation Camp, “ConnecTiNG”, really leaves me quite speechless, as there are just too many things to say.

We started planning this camp in August, and after all plans were finalized, the camp was executed from 7-9 November. For me, it felt like the camp was actually running for 3 months, because the whole process was just so amazing, and the people I was working with were awesome.

Even as I write this, I miss the camp, as there seems to be an emptiness somewhere, but I’m comforted in the fact that ConnecTiNG will live on, and that next year there will be new leaders to bring the new juniors in. (:

Well, there are two things that I would really like to say.

At the beginning of the camp, I for one, was extremely worried that the P6s would not have opened up. They all came with faces of stone, and through the first few icebreakers were withdrawn and unenthusiastic.

However, as the camp progressed through, and the games and group activities went on, their faces were loosened, and smiles appeared, until at the end of all, many even gave feedback that the camp was too short! I believe this camp has really started the journey for the P6s together as a cluster, and sown the seeds of bonding in their hearts. I’m thankful that this camp served as an effective bridge to an otherwise abrupt change from SilverBoxes to TNG, as now the P6s know quite a handful of their TNG seniors, and they’ve experienced the love that has been given to us through TNG, by God. (:

But one thing I did not expect, was to bond as a Sec 3 cluster so much more than I’ve probably ever done. This camp allowed me to know more of my cluster, and gave me the chance to interact more with them. Our cluster is really huge, but through this camp, I’ve talked to people I haven’t really talked to before, and strengthened existing relationships. This was really quite a pleasant surprise, because I only ever imagined bonding the P6s!

I feel so thankful to God and for God in this camp. He’s been so many things, and done so much for us! As we put our faith in Him, so did He stay faithful. He’s not only helped us bond the P6s, but he added in a spice and we were bonded in the process! It’s just…so amazing. From this camp, I realise this –

If we lift everything up to God, He’ll help you through it all, and even give more than you expected. (:


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okay.

now for stuff on a more casual tone, and that you wouldn't publish in a official magazine.

the camp was awesome!
i really didn't expect to miss it so much, it was only after everything that i realised how much it meant to me, and how much it did.

i'm gonna remember everyone in camp comm for something.

david - for your perseverance and patience, and still taking up worship. you own man.
heather - for your ariel-galore.
izabel - for being the first person to call me obnoxious. (heh, though i'm sure many others still at least think it).
hanya - for your moisturised bruise, and crazy endurance in handling games.
thaddeus - THAADEEUUS!!! *heather and hanya sighs*. HAHAHAHAH.
evan - for your parkour, and your mad skillz and SANDFLY!!! WOO! oh and the hugs!
bunny - for your peserverance in insisting that i didn't tell you i changed my founder's award dates! i did loh! everyone remembered!
joann - *tilts head and smiles cheekily, without exposing teeth*. (:

eh but y'all darn bad ah, both nights must go leave me out of your fun ):

1st night - go macs without me.
2nd night - not only did y'all have 2 hrs of fun while i was asleep, y'all MADE me sleep to WRAP ME UP. and it didn't even work!!! no fun lah.

sigh, i miss you camp comm.
at least we've already had one post-camp outing! (:
but i'm not sure how long we'll last as a camp comm...
but by God's grace, if some mystical bond does keep us together, that'd be great. (:

this camp was really amazing. i'm glad we managed to help the P6s feel comforted as they enter TNG, knowing that we're there, and that the love and fun they experienced at camp can be expected in TNG. (:

thanks, all of you guys, game leaders, group leaders.
yall were done good in your effectiveness, efficiency, and energy-feeding. (:


thank You God. (:
this was a good camp indeed.

"these kind of people i'll remember..."