the wind blows violently
all is still.
flashes and glimpses of light
dance across
your emotionless eyes.
forgetting anything
even though they can capture.
could you?
nay, not a chance.
for you, like your eyes.
forget it all.
the wind blows
and all is still
passing by your mild eyes
like wild lashing thoughts
in your mind.
maybe even forced.
just so you think you might care?
do you?
he's just amazing, doing all this.
are you even trying?
oh wait, maybe
you forgot.
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Sunday, February 22, 2009
fusion '09
good stuff, good stuff.
mary gave up her utmost, even for the least of Him.
that's what our passion for God is about.
to worship and give Him all praise.
during worship i saw like, a painting of Jesus hanging on the cross.
and that stuck in my mind for a while.
it was a beautiful piece of art.
and at another point in time, there was this really sweet tangible presence of God i felt, somewhere in the early part of "Rain Down".
but worship really is not about jumping, about raising hands.
yes, we rejoice in the Lord, it's even said in the bible to rejoice!
it's about exalting Him, honouring Him, and just praising Him with all that you got.
it's about surrendering, about accepting, about acknowledging, Him, not just in that 30 mins but in your entire life.
worship is a reflection of life.
recently, i've been more spiritually dry cos' been busy and tired, but i'm recovering now.
haha and wow, the feeling of being spiritually dry is kinda...sian? haha.
it feels good to get back on track and eat the bread again. (:
thank you for the cross, Lord.
mary gave up her utmost, even for the least of Him.
that's what our passion for God is about.
to worship and give Him all praise.
during worship i saw like, a painting of Jesus hanging on the cross.
and that stuck in my mind for a while.
it was a beautiful piece of art.
and at another point in time, there was this really sweet tangible presence of God i felt, somewhere in the early part of "Rain Down".
but worship really is not about jumping, about raising hands.
yes, we rejoice in the Lord, it's even said in the bible to rejoice!
it's about exalting Him, honouring Him, and just praising Him with all that you got.
it's about surrendering, about accepting, about acknowledging, Him, not just in that 30 mins but in your entire life.
worship is a reflection of life.
recently, i've been more spiritually dry cos' been busy and tired, but i'm recovering now.
haha and wow, the feeling of being spiritually dry is kinda...sian? haha.
it feels good to get back on track and eat the bread again. (:
thank you for the cross, Lord.
Thursday, February 19, 2009
my fault? sure.
you try something, and you make a mess.
she asks me to clear it up, cos when she saw it you weren't there anymore.
so i find you at the tv, and after asking you to go clear it up, i got distracted by the tv, and you didn't go anyway.
so she shouts for both of us not switching off electrical appliances, etc, and to once again, clear up the whole freakin' mess.
i tell you to go clear it again, and tell you to help me switch off the stuff that we both left on, better than 2 people going to do a one-man job right?
did i make the mess? no.
did you make it seem like i was obligated to clear it up with you? yes.
was i obligated to clear it up with you? no.
was i not, watching tv, and you still bu shuang me like the mess was my fault? |
did i deserve to take off my time to help you do something, just cos you can't enjoy the tv as well, yet i was not supposed to do it, and you told me to do it, complete with the courtesy of shouting and lack of manners?
and my computer.
did i miss something?
do i owe you anything?
i don't recall so.
so don't you act like it's your right.
why.
why must you do this.
and she goes stereotype me with yall.
and i suffer the shockwaves from you.
which really hurts.
please. stop.
she asks me to clear it up, cos when she saw it you weren't there anymore.
so i find you at the tv, and after asking you to go clear it up, i got distracted by the tv, and you didn't go anyway.
so she shouts for both of us not switching off electrical appliances, etc, and to once again, clear up the whole freakin' mess.
i tell you to go clear it again, and tell you to help me switch off the stuff that we both left on, better than 2 people going to do a one-man job right?
did i make the mess? no.
did you make it seem like i was obligated to clear it up with you? yes.
was i obligated to clear it up with you? no.
was i not, watching tv, and you still bu shuang me like the mess was my fault? |
did i deserve to take off my time to help you do something, just cos you can't enjoy the tv as well, yet i was not supposed to do it, and you told me to do it, complete with the courtesy of shouting and lack of manners?
and my computer.
did i miss something?
do i owe you anything?
i don't recall so.
so don't you act like it's your right.
why.
why must you do this.
and she goes stereotype me with yall.
and i suffer the shockwaves from you.
which really hurts.
please. stop.
Saturday, January 3, 2009
a new chapter...
hi 2009.
last year just zoomed by. probably the fastest year of my life.
and this year is going to be a year of mentorship.
i heard God say that.
it's going to be one where mentorship is a main theme.
looking forward to God in it. (:
i know i don't seem it.
but i do wish there was that common.
last year just zoomed by. probably the fastest year of my life.
and this year is going to be a year of mentorship.
i heard God say that.
it's going to be one where mentorship is a main theme.
looking forward to God in it. (:
i know i don't seem it.
but i do wish there was that common.
Saturday, December 20, 2008
recent events
wow. the holidays are really zooming by.
some recent events.
jon choy's birthday (haha, k, maybe not so recent)
this was really funny.
as in not the party itself, but the nature of how i actually managed to be there.
see, cos i was actually supposed to be in a camp.
and i thought there was no hope, cos once in the camp i thought i was gonna miss choy's birthday for sure.
then i somehow just asked my teacher if i could be excused.
then he contemplated and said yes, but gave a curfew (so i was excused for a few hours).
i was delighted.
ten minutes later i was crying.
because due to the rain, my teacher changed his mind, and i got all my hopes up for nothing, and i was sad lah.
NO i didn't cry in front of everyone.
but i was just darn sad cos it's like, eh, my cell leader's 21st bday man.
and then after i wiped up my tears and joined the rest, my teacher came up behind me and said - "if you can get someone to fetch you, then i'll let you go. if not, forget it lah, huh?"
so i decided to call my mum just in case she was nearby.
she was at home, but offered to take me!!!
Praise God for mummy.
and 40 mins later, i'm at choy's hse, in singlet, cap and slippers :P
cool right.
nong!!
nong came back!!!
we had dinner and a stayover.
nong left back to usa.
family trip (wow i nearly forgot this)
we went to malaysia, port dickson!! :D
it was fun, my first attempt at fishing and neaarrlly caught a crab.
we went go-karting, archery, paintball, jalan-jalan, pool (ball), pool (swim), all sorts of fun stuff. not so much like tourists, but just for fun.
good time of family bonding. (:
sharity gift box (Founder's Men Assessment)
we had 3 consecutive, full, days, of doing quite tiring stuff.
first day i did warehousing and pick-up.
fortunately, last two days we went to man the box at orchard rd, outside taka.
thank martin for his ideas and ways. haha.
it was darn weird lah, people do weird stuff to pass time, which i wanted to go into details but then decided not to. sorry! ;)
THE REAL CAMP.
woohoo, this was really good. no pun.
God gave me revelation, and started doing different things in my life.
God is so good man.
and it also gave me a chance to see how our cluster is growing, and how TNG is growing.
when God told me "TNG is growing", i felt so good. (:
TNG, you're growing man.
official cell gathering
thaddeus, go away. stupid nutcracker.
haha, kidding lah, i don't bear any thing against you. (:
yep, we had an official cell bbq to end of the year.
marcus burnt my arm with a chicken wing. A CHICKEN WING!
thinking about it, i now find the humour stronger than the pain.
i don't think anyone's been burnt by a chicken wing before.
if you have, please tag, i would like to know. :D
and yeah, we had cell sharing and reflection.
the cell was getting everything ironed out, everyone was confessing their wrongs, and dislikes for other cell members in the past, or generally.
and everyone just gracefully accepted the feedback.
jon choy shared about how we had to be in the "pressure-cookers" (like said, at the rhema seminar) because our generation has to rise up fast and grow into leaders, cos' these are the end times. and how he's very encouraged to see our cell growing. (:
sara said she'll always be there, and that we can go to her for girl problems, HAHA. =P
our cell is good man, i love my cell. cool people.
random, whacky and cool.
we're gonna grow. (:
faa
formally known as "Founder's Award Assessment".
we were tested on adventure, first aid, drill, uniform, general knowledge.
scary. had to mug eh.
some-more had cell gathering the previous night.
but it wasn't as bad as i expected.
things went well.
didn't get sent home for uniform. =P
yep. feel liberated now! hahaha.
alright, that's an update.
i'm off to write cards for post-camp people.
...strange, if i recall, this post's tone and language wasn't really like my normal one.
maybe i use more singlish when i'm happier and i talk about shallow-er stuff. =P
i got wild, loose, inside my head.
some recent events.
jon choy's birthday (haha, k, maybe not so recent)
this was really funny.
as in not the party itself, but the nature of how i actually managed to be there.
see, cos i was actually supposed to be in a camp.
and i thought there was no hope, cos once in the camp i thought i was gonna miss choy's birthday for sure.
then i somehow just asked my teacher if i could be excused.
then he contemplated and said yes, but gave a curfew (so i was excused for a few hours).
i was delighted.
ten minutes later i was crying.
because due to the rain, my teacher changed his mind, and i got all my hopes up for nothing, and i was sad lah.
NO i didn't cry in front of everyone.
but i was just darn sad cos it's like, eh, my cell leader's 21st bday man.
and then after i wiped up my tears and joined the rest, my teacher came up behind me and said - "if you can get someone to fetch you, then i'll let you go. if not, forget it lah, huh?"
so i decided to call my mum just in case she was nearby.
she was at home, but offered to take me!!!
Praise God for mummy.
and 40 mins later, i'm at choy's hse, in singlet, cap and slippers :P
cool right.
nong!!
nong came back!!!
we had dinner and a stayover.
nong left back to usa.
family trip (wow i nearly forgot this)
we went to malaysia, port dickson!! :D
it was fun, my first attempt at fishing and neaarrlly caught a crab.
we went go-karting, archery, paintball, jalan-jalan, pool (ball), pool (swim), all sorts of fun stuff. not so much like tourists, but just for fun.
good time of family bonding. (:
sharity gift box (Founder's Men Assessment)
we had 3 consecutive, full, days, of doing quite tiring stuff.
first day i did warehousing and pick-up.
fortunately, last two days we went to man the box at orchard rd, outside taka.
thank martin for his ideas and ways. haha.
it was darn weird lah, people do weird stuff to pass time, which i wanted to go into details but then decided not to. sorry! ;)
THE REAL CAMP.
woohoo, this was really good. no pun.
God gave me revelation, and started doing different things in my life.
God is so good man.
and it also gave me a chance to see how our cluster is growing, and how TNG is growing.
when God told me "TNG is growing", i felt so good. (:
TNG, you're growing man.
official cell gathering
thaddeus, go away. stupid nutcracker.
haha, kidding lah, i don't bear any thing against you. (:
yep, we had an official cell bbq to end of the year.
marcus burnt my arm with a chicken wing. A CHICKEN WING!
thinking about it, i now find the humour stronger than the pain.
i don't think anyone's been burnt by a chicken wing before.
if you have, please tag, i would like to know. :D
and yeah, we had cell sharing and reflection.
the cell was getting everything ironed out, everyone was confessing their wrongs, and dislikes for other cell members in the past, or generally.
and everyone just gracefully accepted the feedback.
jon choy shared about how we had to be in the "pressure-cookers" (like said, at the rhema seminar) because our generation has to rise up fast and grow into leaders, cos' these are the end times. and how he's very encouraged to see our cell growing. (:
sara said she'll always be there, and that we can go to her for girl problems, HAHA. =P
our cell is good man, i love my cell. cool people.
random, whacky and cool.
we're gonna grow. (:
faa
formally known as "Founder's Award Assessment".
we were tested on adventure, first aid, drill, uniform, general knowledge.
scary. had to mug eh.
some-more had cell gathering the previous night.
but it wasn't as bad as i expected.
things went well.
didn't get sent home for uniform. =P
yep. feel liberated now! hahaha.
alright, that's an update.
i'm off to write cards for post-camp people.
...strange, if i recall, this post's tone and language wasn't really like my normal one.
maybe i use more singlish when i'm happier and i talk about shallow-er stuff. =P
i got wild, loose, inside my head.
Sunday, November 16, 2008
to the cross.
recently, i had been feeling kinda bad, off and on, because i felt like a few of my friendships were straining...or the people involved were drifting apart.
and like... other family stuff.
but when i look to the cross,
and realise how Jesus was so rejected as well,
and people didn't appreciate Him for who He was,
although He was the Ultimate...
then i just feel comforted knowing that even if my friends don't fully appreciate me as much as i'd like them too, at least God appreciates me, and that's the best relationship. (:
and still, God works,
cos He showed me how my friend did appreciate me more than i thought. (:
so if any of you feel down because you feel under-appreciated, or feel like you're relationships are straining...
remember Jesus, and God's love, and lift all up to Him. (:
-------------------------------------------------------------
also, i realised how to confirm.
once again, if Christ and God is the focus.
i learn how to differentiate.
and i learn how to know.
and now i know, that i truly don't.
thanks to cremon (:
for reminding me that if it IS, it has to be GOD-CALLED.
and one has to control his emotions, at all costs.
because emotions are of the flesh.
but you want IT to be of God.
and i know that this liking, wasn't called by God.
so i fee liberated.
------------------------------------------
oh and service today was AWESOME.
you could feel God and the Holy Spirit just manifesting in the hall.
and i felt like God was watching pastor reuben just preach, and God was immensely proud.
worship was...convicting for me.
it made me realise i shouldn't be doing some things that i was doing.
not to distract my eyes with evil.
but to focus on the Spirit, on God, and on the cross.
to the cross we look.
and like... other family stuff.
but when i look to the cross,
and realise how Jesus was so rejected as well,
and people didn't appreciate Him for who He was,
although He was the Ultimate...
then i just feel comforted knowing that even if my friends don't fully appreciate me as much as i'd like them too, at least God appreciates me, and that's the best relationship. (:
and still, God works,
cos He showed me how my friend did appreciate me more than i thought. (:
so if any of you feel down because you feel under-appreciated, or feel like you're relationships are straining...
remember Jesus, and God's love, and lift all up to Him. (:
-------------------------------------------------------------
also, i realised how to confirm.
once again, if Christ and God is the focus.
i learn how to differentiate.
and i learn how to know.
and now i know, that i truly don't.
thanks to cremon (:
for reminding me that if it IS, it has to be GOD-CALLED.
and one has to control his emotions, at all costs.
because emotions are of the flesh.
but you want IT to be of God.
and i know that this liking, wasn't called by God.
so i fee liberated.
------------------------------------------
oh and service today was AWESOME.
you could feel God and the Holy Spirit just manifesting in the hall.
and i felt like God was watching pastor reuben just preach, and God was immensely proud.
worship was...convicting for me.
it made me realise i shouldn't be doing some things that i was doing.
not to distract my eyes with evil.
but to focus on the Spirit, on God, and on the cross.
to the cross we look.
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